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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25204675">Nothing like you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/subak_jumokbap/pseuds/subak_jumokbap'>subak_jumokbap</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>4+1 proposals, Alternate Universe - College/University, Boyfriends, Drunk Kissing, Enemies to Lovers, Implied Sexual Content, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Working adults, but only briefly, they are very in love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:26:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,318</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25204675</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/subak_jumokbap/pseuds/subak_jumokbap</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Renjun asked Mark out, Renjun proposed, Mark was wet and Renjun was drunk. </p>
<p>Or</p>
<p>Four marriage proposals and the one time it came with a ring.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Huang Ren Jun/Mark Lee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>76</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>276</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Nothing like you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>the pov changes back and forth but it shouldn’t be confusing to read (i hope)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong><em>One</em></strong>.</p>
<p>Renjun knew Donghyuck’s parents are rich, but standing here in their ridiculously huge, extensively marbled kitchen with an extravagant chandelier hanging above his head, Renjun thinks Donghyuck’s parents must have saved an entire nation to afford this kind of lifestyle. It makes him wonder why Donghyuck would even share an apartment with him when Donghyuck could very obviously afford a mansion if he wanted. Despite Donghyuck’s financial blessing, Renjun finds himself unable to actually picture Donghyuck living in a mansion. In fact, it’s hard to imagine that Donghyuck even has this kind of luxurious background at all. Just the other week, Renjun had to buy Donghyuck a proper lunch because Donghyuck had been eating instant ramen for a whole week. Renjun feels like he’s been scammed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Donghyuck’s parents are away on a business trip and Donghyuck had decided to throw the biggest party Renjun has ever been invited to, to mark the end of their second year of college. Renjun had pulled Jeno along, who was only too excited to go, and they’ve been wilding it out ever since they arrived. Renjun’s lost track of the number of shots he’s had and he’s pretty sure he’s drunk going by how every sound blends into one big lump of noise in his head. The music is pounding in his ears and the lights are a pain to his eyes. Everything makes his head hurt and he feels sick. He must have been complaining endlessly to Jeno about how terrible he feels because Jeno is dragging him to the kitchen with the threat of forcing a litre of water down his throat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno sits him on one of the fancy sleek black stools in the kitchen. In front of him is a large window where a wall is supposed to be. It’s been slid open to grant an opening to the swimming pool glistening under the piercing outdoor lights, a stark brightness against the indigo sky. Renjun gazes outside, elbows resting on the marbled countertop, chin in his hands. Jeno disappears for a whole minute before reappearing on the stool next to him, slamming two cups and a jug of water on the counter. Jeno pours them their first non-alcoholic drink of the night and Renjun raises the cup towards him in thanks before he downs it. The sensation of the cooling water as it slides down his throat is refreshing and equal parts relief. He pours himself another cup and his mind gradually starts to clear from the mess of noises after a few minutes. He can actually make out Jeno’s words for once since the last half an hour.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He rests his forehead on the cool marbled surface and waits for his throbbing headache to subside. Jeno is engrossedly telling him about the stupid game that’s going on in the living room and Renjun mainly hums, not really paying attention that is until Jeno says,</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Whatever you do, don’t look up.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And because Jeno told him not to, he does. He lifts his head up lazily and wonders what Jeno means for him not to look at because there’s nothing interesting going on outside. All he sees are people being chaotic in the pool, groups of people making a ruckus by the side of it, drunk people dancing to the blasting music, couples making out and-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Okay, he sees it now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark Lee is in a simple fitted white tee, fancy maroon jacket thrown over with a pair of skinny black ripped jeans and off-white sneakers to match. He’s laughing with his mouth wide open like he’s having a good time, trying unsuccessfully to stop his friends from cornering him towards the pool. He’s cursing them endlessly while they cackle delightfully at his struggle. Renjun thinks Mark’s attempt at beating them is hopeless. Mark’s heels are digging the floor, a useless move because the floor is slippery and he’s up five to one. His friends simply have to walk him back a few more steps before he has no other way out. Interestingly, by some stroke of luck, Mark manages to duck and escape swiftly between them. He runs away with a victorious laugh towards somewhere the large opening of the kitchen doesn’t grant a view of. Needless to say, his friends chase after him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun frowns. “What’s he doing here?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why else,” Jeno says, like he can’t believe Renjun is asking something so obvious. “He was invited just like we were.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck me,” Renjun groans, resting his head against the marbled surface again. “Can’t a guy just have one good day without Mark fucking Lee ruining it, please.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark Lee is the worst person Renjun’s ever had the displeasure to meet. Mark and Renjun shared a total of six out of the ten modules Renjun took in the academic year. That means they saw each other more times than necessary in a single week, more times than Renjun would like in a whole year. Renjun thinks the rivalry between them wouldn’t have happened if Mark hadn’t stolen his project topic at the start. Renjun had called dibs on the topic and he was pretty sure he made it clear to everyone else. It was a silent agreement between college students that whoever called dibs, gets it. So when the TA had read the project topics off the list for them to choose, Renjun was ready to claim his. Only that he didn’t, because Mark had beaten him to it by a fraction of a second. Renjun had decided to despise him with a passion from that day on. The horror he felt when he saw Mark at his other electives the next few days was indescribable. It felt like he was cursed. He made it a point to make the modules they shared together a living hell for Mark.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno sighs, obviously tired of being on the receiving end of Renjun’s unceasing complaints about Mark, yet again. He gives Renjun an exasperated look. “Just go talk to him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun isn’t sure if he’s hearing right. It must be the alcohol talking. There is no way Jeno had just told him to go <em>talk</em>to Mark Lee.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes that is exactly what I said. Go talk to him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun stares at him. “Jeno, have you not been listening? I don’t even want to see him here, why should I go talk to him?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Because I’m sick of hearing how much you can’t stand him when you actually want to kiss him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun gives an offended look. “What the fuck?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno looks at him lazily, the words flowing out of his mouth like they’re old news. “Face it. You like him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun widens his eyes when he realises that Jeno actually means it. Jeno must be far more drunk than he is. He scoffs out a laugh. “We literally hate each other. He despises me and I can’t stand his guts.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno doesn’t look impressed. “That’s what you think.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun looks at Jeno amusedly. “Okay, then what do you think?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think the only reason you two get on each other’s nerves is because you always pick on him. How’s he supposed to respond? Sweep you off your feet and kiss you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun makes a disgusted face. Mark Lee kissing him? “Don’t be gross.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Think about it. He responds to every single one of your jabs. If I found you annoying, I would ignore the hell out of you. But he doesn’t. I think he kind of enjoys it. I think you both do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s annoying that a drunk Jeno still makes more sense to him than his sober self would and he hates Jeno for that. Now his brain is going through an extensive file search, analysing every moment of interaction he had with Mark this whole year, trying to find even a single chance of Mark ignoring him when he’d started anything.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Search results - zero.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>What the fuck does this even mean?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just <em>go</em>,” Jeno shoves his arm. Renjun resists against it. “Just admit you like him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun doesn’t. He pours himself a drink from the large array on the counter. He’s giving up on water at this point. He’s not sure if he wants things to start making sense in his head. As he finishes downing his cup and slams it onto the counter, he spots Mark coming back into view. His jacket is nowhere to be seen and he’s barefooted now. He’s laughing while walking backwards, palms out defensively in front of his chest as his friends start walking him towards the pool again. He makes a begging gesture but his friends continue ganging up on him noisily, making him inch closer and closer to the water. Mark turns his head back carefully to calculate the distance between him and the pool. He abruptly stops moving and his friends watch his every move, ready to tackle him and throw him in if it comes down to it. Mark turns his head back around, defeat written on his face as he fishes out his phone from his pocket and passes it to one of his friends. He looks them in the eyes one by one and his face slowly breaks into a grin, the kind that says he’s going to do something stupid and he’ll regret it, but he’s going to do it anyway.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He turns on his heels, runs towards the pool on his own accord and jumps in fully clothed with a yell. The splash is huge and he surfaces from it with a loud laugh. His friends holler and cheer and he takes revenge by swimming towards the edge and splashing water at them mercilessly. He gets a string of curses in return. He laughs, sweeps his hair back and Renjun finds that it’s really easy to not look away. The artificial blue glow of the pool enhances his cheekbones, softening the sharp edges of his face against the charcoal sky. For that ridiculous moment, Renjun thinks he’s looking at perfection. Renjun dreadfully realises that he’s… captivated. Fuck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark tussles his hair and droplets of water fly everywhere. He splashes water at his friends once more for good measure, making them scurry away with unhappy yells. It makes Mark break out into a laugh again and the smile on his face is admittedly… pretty. It’s pretty. Fuck, it’s <em>pretty. </em>Mark pulls himself up to sit by the edge of the pool and Renjun doesn’t miss how his shirt clings dearly to his body. Mark dangles his legs in the water and a puddle starts to form around where he sits. He jokingly calls for his friends to come sit with him. None of them do. “Fucking assholes,” Mark shouts with an easy smile. Renjun silently takes in Mark’s light and lively manner, wondering if Mark had always been this fun and cheery.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Mark sits fully turned away from the house, Renjun gets a view of Mark’s back and he watches how Mark’s muscles move beneath his soaked shirt and okay, maybe he does… kind of… like Mark. So what?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno lets out a groan. “God you’re so infuriating. Go talk to him and don’t insult him for once.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sounds easy. Only that Renjun has never done it before. “Then I have nothing to talk to him about,” he states blankly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeno seems to be reaching his limit because instead of pouring more water, he’s mixing the drinks on the counter for himself. It’s understandable that he doesn’t want to be sober for this. “Go tell him how much you think of him or, I don’t know, propose to him and tell him how much you’d die for him. Tell him you love him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun thinks about it for one second. That’s all his drunken mind needs before he’s stealing Jeno’s drink and downing it in one gulp. He doesn’t want to be sober for what he’s about to do either. He gets off the stool and approaches the opening. He’s pretty sure the opening isn’t meant as an entrance or exit but he’s drunk and it’s the shortest route there is. He climbs over the ledge and stumbles outside. He spots a spare towel hanging on one of the outdoor chairs and grabs it on a whim. Mark’s still swinging his legs by the pool, alone. The puddle around him has only gotten bigger. It looks like Renjun’s going to have to get wet for this. Mark Lee is a fucking menace.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He approaches Mark.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mark fucking Lee.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark turns at hearing Renjun’s voice and frowns when he sees that it’s Renjun. The disdain on his face is clear. “Even here? Are you obsessed with me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dickhead,” Renjun retorts easily. He drops the towel on top of Mark’s head. He takes a seat beside Mark in Mark’s own puddle, feeling the coldness and wetness of the floor seeping through his jeans. He submerges his legs into the water too and very quickly finds his entire lower body wet. Great.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark takes the towel from his head and drapes it over his shoulders. He doesn’t thank Renjun for it but he eyes him suspiciously. Renjun has a feeling Mark must be wondering why he’s suddenly seated here beside him. Renjun doesn’t know either, to be honest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are you talking to me?” Mark questions, sounding defensive, as if Renjun might pull a prank on him out of nowhere.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jeno told me to,” Renjun says. His mind is foggier now than before but he thinks that statement should be correct.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jeno?” Mark scoffs. “Were you that bored and annoying that he had to get rid of you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck off.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark wraps the towel tighter around his torso. He glances Renjun up and down. “You’re drunk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s a party,” Renjun retorts flatly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Isn’t it dangerous for you to be near the pool?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun shrugs because his mind is too messy to be thinking about what’s dangerous and what’s not. He was out here to do something. What was it? He remembers. “Jeno told me to talk to you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark watches him uncertainly. “You told me that already. What does he want?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun’s head is a blur and he tries hard to remember what Jeno told him to do. <em>Don’t insult him</em>. Too late. <em>Talk to him</em>. Doing that now. <em>Propose to him</em>. Okay.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He told me to propose to you,” Renjun informs, turning his head to look at Mark. He looks <em>good</em>, his wet black hair swept back to reveal his forehead, droplets of water clinging on the slope of his nose and his philtrum. Even in his hazy state of mind, Mark’s face appears in high definition. And it’s a very nice face. Renjun swallows. “I want to marry you.” Does he? A marriage with Mark Lee doesn’t sound all that bad now that he’s thinking about it. “I want to marry you,” he repeats more determinedly. “Let’s get married.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark barks out a laugh. He stares at Renjun incredulously. “What the fuck? How drunk are you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun grips the edge of the pool. “Not that drunk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark snorts and entertains Renjun just for the fun of it. “And why do you want to marry me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun has to wreck his brain for the answer. Did Jeno tell him what to say?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jeno told me that I like you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jeno told you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun nods.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark shakes his head, still not believing that he has to deal with Renjun’s drunken nonsense. “We hate each other,” he reminds him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun furrows his brows. “No, Jeno specifically said that I like-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Forget what Jeno said. What do you think of me?” Mark asks. He’s stopped swinging his legs now and Renjun guesses he must be talking about something serious. “Huang, what do you think of me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun ponders. He looks into Mark’s eyes and he realises he actually likes how they’re almond-shaped and how they always seem so bright and pretty. “I like you,” Renjun says, just comprehending how much he actually enjoys it whenever Mark pays attention to him. He wonders at which point exactly had he caught feelings between all their banters, but it’s too much work for his brain at the moment. It doesn’t matter anyway when it happened - he likes Mark now, and he’s going to do something about it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun looks at his own bare fingers. Then he starts patting his pockets. He frowns. “I don’t have a ring on me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark hangs his head down and lets out a weak laugh. He sounds a little terrified. “You’re joking. You’re absolutely shitting me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Here, take this instead,” Renjun decides spontaneously and takes his necklace off. He struggles with the hook at the back but he manages it. He hangs it round Mark’s neck and puts it on for him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark blinks, unable to keep up with what’s happening. When Renjun pulls his hands away, Mark fingers the silver moon pendant of the necklace, slightly at a lost of what to do. His eyes shake when he looks at Renjun. “You’re serious.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes,” Renjun affirms with a nod of his head. Mark isn’t smiling so Renjun wonders if he’s said something wrong. He tilts his head. “Did I say the correct answer?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang, you like me and you want me to marry you. Do you hear yourself?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Yes, he’s pretty clear that’s what he said. But why does Mark sound so-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You… don’t want to marry me?” Renjun asks quietly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, that’s not the-” Mark says, bewildered. “We’re not even dating!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh,” Renjun says and he thinks that’s a waste. Mark’s so pretty, why isn’t he dating Mark? He’s going to fix that. “Are you free tomorrow?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark laughs in disbelief, his tone rising in pitch. “You’re asking me out? You’re so drunk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun knits his brows. “Is that a yes?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark analyses him, himself looking unsure. He lets out a loud exhale. “Fuck,” he mutters. “You’re really serious?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, I am seriously asking you out,” Renjun says. He watches Mark’s face while waiting for Mark’s answer. He sees the moment Mark makes up his mind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark takes in a deep breath and the look on his face tells that he hopes he doesn’t regret this. He breathes out his answer. “<em>Yes</em>.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun thinks there’s something wrong with him because his heart is beating an at abnormal speed and it feels like his chest is about to burst. Mark laughs quietly watching him. “Why are you smiling like that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Smiling? Had he been smiling? He guesses he’s happy. That would explain the state of his heart. “You said yes,” Renjun answers simply, letting out a short, breathy laugh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You like me?” Mark asks again just to be sure because the whole situation is so absurd it’s hard for him to believe that any of it is real. Renjun notes a distinct gentleness in Mark’s voice that wasn’t there before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun hums and nods. Mark doesn’t say anything. Renjun wonders if it’s his turn to speak. “Can I kiss you?” he asks, because he’s been thinking it the whole time he’s been sitting here staring at Mark’s face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck,” Mark mutters. He runs his hand through his hair, looking part stressed, part delirious. Renjun can’t help but stare at his lips. He blinks dazedly and licks his own and that’s when Mark reaches out to grab him by the nape and kisses him rough. It’s exhilarating, it makes his heart soar and flutters erupt in his stomach. His hand finds Mark’s jaw easily and he uses it to lead Mark to kiss him deeper.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suddenly there are cheers in the background, a cacophony of ‘<em>Mark Lee’</em>s, whoops and hollers. The noises sound like they’re coming from Mark’s friends and Renjun doesn’t know what they’re making a commotion about. His drunken mind is only able to focus on one thing. But because he’s focused on Mark, he is able to register that the commotion seems to make Mark smile. When Mark’s fingers tangle in his hair and Mark licks sweetly into his mouth, he gets the startling albeit belated realisation that this means Mark likes him too. Mark fucking Lee. Who would have thought.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And that’s how their story came about, the one their friends will never let them live down. The first time Renjun asked Mark out, Renjun proposed, Mark was wet and Renjun was drunk.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong> <em>Two.</em> </strong>
</p>
<p>Renjun is hard to read. Mark should have known from the start because that’s how their relationship started in the first place. Renjun had annoyed him endlessly for an entire year only to confess to him at the end of it. In fact, reading Renjun proves to be quite the challenge most of the time. And right now Mark is having a hard time deciding what exactly Renjun wants.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark hasn’t been allowed to come over to Renjun’s and Donghyuck’s apartment for the past two weeks. Renjun didn’t explicitly tell him so but he can guess just as much from how Renjun keeps denying him from coming over. Mark thinks it has to do with how it’s finals period right now and even though he understands, he’s still kind of bummed about it. The good thing is that Renjun texts him every day. The thing that throws him off today however, is that Renjun keeps texting him that he misses him. Renjun is hardly the affectionate type which explains why Mark is more used to hearing Renjun’s harmless insults than his profession of love. Renjun suddenly asking for affection makes Mark want to see him more than he usually does. He knows he isn’t welcomed but what is he supposed to do when Renjun’s texts are telling him a different thing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>What’s wrong?</em>He texts Renjun back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun’s reply comes less than a minute.<em>Nothing. I told you, I just miss you.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>The miserable truth is that Mark misses him too. They haven't seen each other since Renjun had decidedly holed himself up in the apartment. Mark misses him a lot actually. He decides to try his luck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Want me to come over?</em>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>Renjun’s reply comes quickly. <em>You know my answer is no.</em></p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>It’s a lie if Mark wasn’t disappointed. But Renjun follows it up with another text.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Call me?</em>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>Mark takes off his glasses and places them on top of his notes. He rubs the bridge of his nose and sighs tiredly. It’s four in the evening and he hadn’t taken a break since seven this morning. He was reading his notes even throughout lunch. He leans back against his chair, feels his back scream in relief as he calls Renjun.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” Mark says with a smile when Renjun picks up. “What are you doing?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Being a student,” Renjun replies lifelessly. “What ‘bout you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Being a <em>good </em>student.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Very funny,” Renjun says flatly. “When are you going to be a good boyfriend? I miss you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark feels his heart warm. Renjun doesn’t always act like this with him so he enjoys it as much as he can whenever Renjun does. He scoffs a laugh. “I <em>am </em>a good boyfriend. You just don’t know how to appreciate me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There’s a sassy tone concealing a layer of shyness when Renjun speaks. “I do appreciate you. Why else would I miss you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But you won’t let me come over. And you refuse to come over.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m busy.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Unconvincing. He knows Renjun is studying but Renjun texts him every day, at least once every hour. Mark would rather add up all the time they spend texting and use it to see Renjun instead.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Then there’s nothing I can do,” Mark says simply. He drums his fingers against the table. “If you’re busy then I shouldn’t have called you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re ending the call already?” Renjun says, sounding betrayed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re busy,” Mark shrugs, a smile playing on his lips. He can imagine how his reply must irk Renjun terribly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You asshole,” Renjun hurls and it makes Mark laugh. It was starting to get weird without Renjun calling him names.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark absentmindedly reaches out for his pen. “I miss you. Let me see you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“After finals end,” Renjun promises. That’s in two weeks. Mark will go crazy before that happens.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I want to see you now,” Mark says, twirling his pen with his free hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun hums. “Face time.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“In person.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fine then. Bye.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re so annoying,” Renjun huffs. Mark smiles to himself. He knows he's being childish but it seems to work in getting Renjun to crack. Renjun must really miss him a lot if he keeps insisting on making the call last longer. Mark just has to push a little bit more to make Renjun invite him over out of his own will.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jun, I need to study. And you need to study too. We can’t keep calling each other all the time.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ugh,” Renjun groans and it sounds like he’s smashing his face into a pillow. “Ijustwishyouwerehere.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s ears perk up. The words had tumbled out of Renjun’s mouth quickly but he thinks he caught them. He wants to hear Renjun say them again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I said I wish you were here, dickhead.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark stops twirling his pen and sits up straighter. A smile starts to bloom on his face. “Does that mean I can come over?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun ponders for a few moments and he says out resolutely, “To study.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark grins. “To study. Of course.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll see you soon,” Renjun sighs, his voice tender. The call ends and Mark doesn’t waste any time as he rushes to dump all his notes inside his bag.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark comes over in twenty and Renjun welcomes him with a notably long hug and a peck on his cheek. Renjun acting affectionate the first thing he sees him is not a typical Renjun behaviour and Mark notes that Renjun must have really missed him. He kisses Renjun’s hair just before Renjun lets him go and when he steps into the apartment, he notes that Donghyuck isn’t around. Renjun informs him that Donghyuck’s been out since after lunch for a group project. Seeing that Donghyuck isn't home, they decide on studying out in the living room since they don’t have to be mindful of their volume. Mark sits on one end of the couch while Renjun sits at the other. Their legs tangle together in the middle. They do a good job of studying for two hours, that is until Renjun starts getting other ideas. Mark feels Renjun nudging his calves and he brings his notes away from his face to give Renjun a reprimanding look.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun shrugs, feigning ignorance which makes Mark raise an eyebrow at him. In truth, Mark is actually impressed they managed to last longer than an hour without fooling around. He duly returns to his notes and feels Renjun toe his calve again. This time he bends his legs closer to himself so Renjun isn’t able to reach him. He wants to see how long before Renjun starts getting bolder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not long apparently because Renjun throws himself over Mark’s legs and hooks his chin over Mark’s knees. Mark hides his smile behind his notes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you really going to study the whole time?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark can’t see Renjun’s face when his notes are in front of him but he’s pretty sure Renjun is pouting, even if he doesn’t realise it himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you <em>not</em>going to study the whole time?” Mark shoots back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun uses his finger to fold Mark’s notes down to look at his face. Renjun has a glare ready for him but Mark returns it with a twinkle in his eyes. Renjun annoyedly snatches his notes from his hands and puts it away without caring where it ends up. He crawls into the space between Mark’s knees and Mark lets him. He removes Mark’s glasses but puts it away carefully on the table in front of the couch before he rests his chin on Mark’s chest to look at him. Mark looks down at Renjun amusedly, sweeping Renjun’s bangs to the side and taking in the pout on his face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you still going to study? When I’m right here?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark smirks down at him. “You specifically said to study.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Since when do you listen to me so well?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I always do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark pulls Renjun up easily over him. Renjun places his hands on Mark’s shoulder and Mark sits up halfway to kiss him. They start slow, exchanging sweet and tender kisses that Mark’s been deprived of for two whole weeks. When Mark fully sits up to kiss Renjun properly, Renjun straddles Mark’s lap, his thighs on either side of Mark’s and his arms thrown loosely around Mark’s neck. He starts kissing Mark more deeply, more needy and Mark swallows it all, keeping pace to match Renjun’s intensity. He gets the hint of what Renjun wants and he supports Renjun as he stands. Renjun makes it easier by wrapping his legs around his waist.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun smiles, pleased that Mark’s caught on to his intentions. Mark starts walking them to Renjun’s room, all too familiar with the path that he doesn’t have to mind his steps while he drowns in Renjun’s addictive kisses and bold touches. They end up in front of Renjun’s door, panting for breath and laughing into each other’s mouth.</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>“Donghyuck’s going to kill me,” Renjun says, breathless.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We promised no boys in the house finals week.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark leaves a kiss on his lips. “You’re a boy.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Other </em>boys, dumbass.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark kisses below his ear sweetly. “Warn him not to come home. Bribe him with something.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I feel bad.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun really is hard to read. He was the one that had started playing around and now he has the audacity to feel bad towards Donghyuck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll do it then,” Mark says, pulling away to look at his face. “Where’s your phone?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun smiles, happy that Mark’s doing it for him. “My pocket.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark gives Renjun a harmless roll of his eyes and fishes for his phone from his pocket. Renjun takes that chance to cling closer. He adjusts his legs around Mark’s waist more securely, and hides his face into Mark’s neck, licking and teasing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck, Jun,” Mark laughs, one hand on Renjun’s ass to support him, his other hand occupied with texting Donghyuck over Renjun’s shoulder. Renjun makes it a point to kiss his neck obscenely and he’s a devil for doing it because he knows how much Mark likes it. Mark’s hand shakes as he tries to type out a proper message but Renjun is making it extremely difficult for him. Renjun bites and sucks and Mark lets out a strangled moan, letting his face fall onto Renjun’s shoulder. He has to strain to bring his face up again and he breathes deeply.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let me just send this text. Fuck,” He laughs, winded. “Give me a second.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun does, moving away from Mark’s neck to leave light kisses along his jaw. When Mark’s done after much struggle, Mark doesn’t remember where he puts Renjun’s phone; back into Renjun’s pocket or into his own pocket, or maybe he dropped it on the floor. Because once he’s done, he bounces Renjun up to balance him better and he brings Renjun’s face down into a searing kiss. Renjun enjoys it, from the sounds he makes and the way he holds the back of Mark’s neck to reciprocate the kiss fervently. Renjun hums, pleased with the way Mark kisses him and he decides to take it further.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>With one arm hooked around Mark’s neck, the other comes under Mark’s shirt, teasingly roaming his back. Mark makes a noise at the back of his throat at the feel of Renjun’s fingers leaving scalding touches over his spine. His legs can’t support Renjun’s weight any longer and he promptly puts Renjun down. It looks like his sanity can’t take it any longer as well because once Renjun’s feet touch the floor, he pushes Renjun against the door, their bodies pressed together. It gets hot between them but Renjun doesn’t mind the heat nor the roughness, too distracted when their hips align and Mark’s hand snakes under the hem of his shirt, fingers grazing his hipbone. Mark sneaks his fingers past the waistband of Renjun’s shorts. Renjun whines, presses against Mark and grabs Mark’s face to kiss him harder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“God, you’re so perfect,” Mark pants.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Shut up,” Renjun bites back. Mark lets out a breathy laugh. If he wasn’t so occupied kissing Renjun, he would have noticed the blush on Renjun’s face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You are though,” Mark speaks again, like he needs Renjun to believe him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun reluctantly pulls away from the kiss, annoyed that Mark is talking when they could <em>not </em>be talking. He rests their foreheads together and uses the chance to catch his breath. Mark looks at Renjun through hooded eyes and he thinks this every time but Renjun looks ridiculously pretty. His cheeks are rosy and his lips are shiny and red. He looks a wreck but in the most desirable way. Renjun’s eyes are hazy when he looks at Mark’s lips. Mark wants to kiss him again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mark fucking Lee, stop your nonsense and kiss me,” Renjun demands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark is only happy to do so. He leans down to catch Renjun's lips with his, his knee slotted between Renjun’s thigh while Renjun’s fingers tangle in his hair. The heat between them builds up again fast and Mark loves this feeling; feeling like he’s light, floating in bliss while Renjun kisses him senseless. There’s something about how much he feels for Renjun and knowing Renjun feels the same way that makes his chest feel a little too tight. It’s like he’s overwhelmed with an emotion he can’t quite place, a blend of yearning and adoration, something that leaves him weak yet wholesome. And it roars fiercely yet tamely, the gentlest of powerful waves, a blazing fire that doesn’t scorch.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s clawing him from inside, defeaning him so much that he feels like he’s not able to contain it all within himself. Like it’s hard to breathe. It’s bigger than him, he realises this and he accepts it right away because it makes sense that what he feels for Renjun would equate to something as great as this. He kisses Renjun more heatedly, his fingers digging deeper into Renjun’s waist. He feels Renjun’s surprise at the sudden intensity, feels Renjun wondering why when Renjun takes a tentative hand to his cheek.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun slows them down, taking it languid. He resets the pace, coaxing Mark to go slowly with gentle brushes of his fingers at the back of Mark’s neck. Renjun’s kisses taste so sickeningly sweet Mark thinks he would never not find them intoxicating. When he moves to kiss the corner of Renjun’s lips, he says, “I love you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He feels Renjun’s lips curling into a smile and he presses a full kiss to Renjun’s lips. He doesn’t know what makes him say it, only knows that he wants to. “I want to marry you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It catches Renjun completely by surprise. Renjun pulls away immediately and stares at him, wide-eyed. Renjun takes Mark’s face between his hands and looks earnestly into his eyes. “Did you drink before coming here?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No!” Mark splutters.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Then where is this coming from?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark shrugs, his hands rubbing the soft skin on Renjun’s waist, pulling Renjun closer. “I just think I want to marry you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun laughs in disbelief. “No, you don’t.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, I do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, you <em>don’t</em>.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, I <em>do</em>, and so did you,” Mark reminds him. “You wanted to marry me when you asked me out a year ago.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mark,” Renjun laughs, leaning in to kiss his lips. “I was drunk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But I’m not,” Mark says with such firmness that it almost convinces Renjun. But he needs more than an <em>almost</em>, he needs to completely convince Renjun that he means this. As crazy as it sounds.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun lets go of Mark’s cheeks. He tilts his head decidedly. “Do you always want to marry your boyfriends?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark leans in to nose along Renjun’s jaw. “No,” he says truthfully. He leaves light kisses below Renjun’s ear and trails to kiss Renjun’s lips. Renjun grants him the sweet kiss he’s searching for.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun is quiet. He guides Mark’s face to look at him. His eyes search Mark’s for any kind of doubt or uncertainty, or any sign to show that this is all a joke but he isn’t able to find any. He slides his palm down Mark’s cheek. His voice is soft when he speaks. “We still have a year left of school, babe.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark knows. They’re still only college students and even after they graduate, there’s the struggle of finding jobs and dealing with actual adult things their student statuses can no longer hide them from. He doesn't blame Renjun for only thinking of the present because people don’t usually go into relationships during college expecting something long-term. In fact, Mark didn’t either. The fact that they’ve only been dating a year just further supports that Mark might be jumping into things too fast.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He <em>knows</em>this, yet he has never felt this strongly about anyone and be so certain about it. He’s sure Renjun is the one he wants to spend his life with. Renjun might think he’s crazy for thinking of a forever with him but right now looking into Renjun’s eyes, something tells him that Renjun might just be as crazy as he is. Because he sees it as he gazes into Renjun’s eyes - and it’s scary and thrilling - that it’s not impossible Renjun might feel the same way he does.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let’s get married after that. I want to marry you.” Mark leans in and kisses him delicately. “Marry me, Jun,” he whispers against Renjun’s lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark kisses him again but only because he’s too scared to look Renjun in the eyes and see what’s written there. But Renjun pulls back, wanting to look at him and he braves himself to meet it. He tries not to show how hesitant he is to see Renjun’s reaction. Renjun sighs watching him and kisses him chastely on the lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“On one condition. Don’t you dare get on your knees when you ask the question. I fucking hate that cringey shit.” Renjun stares straight at him, waiting for his answer and all Mark can do is nod dazedly. He makes a mental note of the specific request. A small smile sneaks up on Renjun’s face and it makes Mark feel relieved that he hadn’t been dumped for being impulsive despite how certain he is. Renjun laughs at him for it. When Renjun opens his bedroom door, he tugs Mark in with him and they tumble in while connected to each other, laughter exchanged between lips. That evening Mark does get on his knees, but for an entirely different reason.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong> <em>Three.</em> </strong>
</p>
<p>Mark’s family and friends form quite a small crowd. Renjun spots Mark’s parents, brother and his best friends, Jaemin and Yukhei, easily. The others are familiar faces from Mark’s lab research group that he recognises as Jungwoo, Jaehyun and Sicheng. Donghyuck had driven him and Jeno here and they’re welcomed with smiles and friendly pats as they join the little group circling Mark. They talk and catch up with each other, mindless chatter paired with light-hearted laughter. At one point it becomes a Mark-roasting session, fitting for the main character of the day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When the time finally comes and they know there’s no more delaying, Mark’s parents and brother hug him warmly, ask him all the important questions and make him make all sorts of promises. Jaemin’s turn comes right after. He squishes Mark’s cheeks, asks him if he’s got everything packed and ready. Mark winces when Jaemin doesn’t let him go and everyone laughs at his suffering under Jaemin’s exaggerative care. When Jaemin’s done smothering Mark with his love, Yukhei hugs him for a long time before everyone else complains that he’s hogging Mark. They all came up to hug Mark and exchange goodbyes one by one. When they’re done, Mark meets Renjun’s eyes and Renjun swallows, finding his throat dry.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright guys, Mark’s giving us the look,” his brother says, signalling for everyone to give Mark and Renjun some space. Mark’s parents give Renjun a warm smile which makes Renjun blush before they walk away arm in arm pointing delightedly at the sculptures and flower arrangements nearby.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hyung, please. That’s unnecessary,” Mark says giving his brother a pointed look, hand subconsciously reaching out to hold Renjun’s elbow when Renjun steps closer to him. He gingerly slides it down Renjun’s forearm and lets their palms meet. “Don’t herd everyone away.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s more for us than for you,” Donghyuck says, patting Mark’s back as he and Jeno make their way to raid the vending machines at the side, pulling Mark’s brother with them to take advantage of his wallet. Jaemin and Yukhei stick with Mark’s lab group, already starting on a conversation about their respective research.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun silently laces his fingers with Mark’s and gives their friends a roll of his eyes as they walk past. They wink, make suggestive faces and childish comments, all of which Mark and Renjun endure tiresomely until it’s just them. It’s only then Mark turns to stand in front of him, thumb caressing his hand, a genuine easy smile on his face that makes Renjun’s stomach twist.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For someone who’s leaving his boyfriend behind for two years, Mark looks happy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And the fact that Mark truly is makes Renjun choke up a little. He feels bad for wanting Mark to stay. He had made up his mind determinedly on the way here - he was not going to be weak and cry in front of Mark (again). It’ll be a happy farewell, one filled with smiles and well wishes. He had months to prepare for this moment and he had spent all of last night talking to Mark. It shouldn’t be this hard for him to see Mark leave.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But there’s something about Mark’s bright smile that does something to him. The way Mark looks at him with fondness, the kind of look that tells Mark believes they’ll be okay, that he trusts Renjun will be wonderfully fine without him because he knows Renjun can get through this. That the amount of trust he has in Renjun and their relationship is so much that it allows him to leave without any regrets. It makes Renjun feel incompetent because he doesn’t know if he can live up to what Mark believes of him. He’d like to think he’d get through this without much difficulty as well, but the truth is he had months to prepare not to break down at this final moment, yet it feels like he’s on the verge of crumbling. Mark’s going and he’ll be gone for a hauntingly long time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s eyes suddenly widen looking at his face, shock trickling in to mix with the fondness. “Babe,” Mark laughs, letting go of Renjun’s hand to hold his face gently. He traces Renjun’s cheekbones. “You told me you wouldn’t cry.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun did tell him that yesterday. Mark had visited him for a few hours last night, their last few hours to spend together. Mark had said some sappy things that made him cry against his will. After bawling his eyes out into Mark’s chest, he had adamantly mentioned that there was no way he was going to cry at the airport too. The only thing that saved his pride was that Mark had cried with him. But now Mark is making him cry again and he’s the only one with tears gathering in his eyes. It’s unfair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun glares at Mark, feels the tears starting to get too much. He takes deep breaths and tries to control them. He blinks a few times, not allowing them to fall. He waits for them to subside.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark tilts his head, his eyes round and concerned. He holds both of Renjun’s hands loosely and gives a small laugh. “It’s okay to cry. You shouldn’t hold it back. You know I don’t like it when you do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You think you’re so funny,” Renjun bites. He knows if he starts crying Mark will laugh at him. But if he doesn’t <em>stop</em>crying, Mark will panic and start crying with him because Mark doesn’t like it when he cries either. So really, Mark asking him to cry is not the wisest decision right now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun curls his fingers around Mark’s. He swallows the lump in his throat. “The plane can get cold. Do you have your jacket with you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“In my bag.” Mark eyes him silently, honest care shining in his eyes, displayed bare for Renjun to see. It makes Renjun’s chest feel tight. “You still remember everything I told you last night?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun nods. A night of honest feelings, secrets and confessions. Renjun doesn’t think he’d ever had someone express themselves so openly and honestly and made him feel so cherished. Mark annoys him half of the time but Mark doesn’t ever not show how much he cares about him. And Renjun thinks maybe that’s why he wants to keep Mark for as long as he is allowed to. When Mark laid his true feelings and thoughts for Renjun that night, it was an act of complete trust. It touched Renjun so deeply that he never expected himself to cry that horribly. It had been utterly embarrassing. Mark had held him through it, warm eyes and gentle whispers that soothed him till he calmed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After crying that much, there was no way he would be able to forget anything Mark told him. He’ll keep it in his heart and mind for as long as he is able to, and then some.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark tugs Renjun’s hands gently, and then he’s pulling Renjun in and wrapping his arms around Renjun’s body. Renjun sighs into it, resting his head over Mark’s shoulder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Two years,” Renjun mutters, even if <em>I’ll miss you </em>is what he wants to say. He’d said it an embarrassing amount of times yesterday. He’s trying not to make himself look so desperate even if he knows that Mark feels just as desperate as he does.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s going to be gone for two whole years to complete his Master’s degree while Renjun stays behind, try not to hate his job and start building up his career. They’ve gone through some rough patches before and they’ve spent some time apart when Renjun had to fly back home. The most time they've been apart was three months and it wasn’t easy for the both of them. Renjun thinks the months leading up to this moment should have prepared him enough for the next two years, but whenever the thought of Mark not being around pops in his head, it gets hard for him to smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s only two years,” Mark says back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Only two years. Two years is such a long time Renjun will die before the two years come and go.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No you won’t,” Mark laughs, crushing Renjun closer to his chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun closes his eyes, basks in the feeling of being embraced; savouring the feeling of comfort, warmth and security of being in Mark’s arms. He’ll have to go two years without it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You can come visit me, and I’ll come back during the holidays,” Mark says. “It’s not like I’m leaving for good.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun knows, but that doesn’t provide a good enough reason for him not to be sad at Mark leaving. Seeing Mark only once or twice a year shouldn’t be a reason to cheer him up. He pulls away from the hug to look at Mark’s face and Mark doesn’t let go, hugging his waist loosely to keep him close. He stares quietly into Mark’s eyes. They’ve never had to be apart for so long and it didn’t seem very real that Mark was going to leave. Not until yesterday. Now they only have minutes to spare. He wishes there was a way to make Mark stay.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He eyes the necklace that Mark’s wearing, a tiny silver moon pendant hanging on a silver chain. He knows it’s stupid, but-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Marry me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark looks surprised. “Jun-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mark fucking lee, marry me,” Renjun says earnestly, his eyes pleading and urgent as he searches Mark’s own.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s eyes turn gentle and he looks at Renjun softly, the kind of look that tells he sees through Renjun immediately, knows his insecurities and how helpless he feels.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jun,” Mark says tenderly. He leans down and kisses him sweetly. His breath ghosts over Renjun’s lips. ‘I’d love to. But you know I can’t stay.” Mark’s eyes crinkle. “You don’t even have a ring to tie me down.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s funny what Renjun would give up in that instant. His bank account, his apartment, Donghyuck’s car. “If I buy one right now-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark gives a small laugh, kisses him again and lingers at his lips. “Two years, Jun. We’ll be fine.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun closes his eyes and Mark pulls him in, his head resting above Renjun’s. Renjun grasps the fabric of Mark’s shirt. Two years. They’ll get through this. Renjun nods and relaxes his hands, palms resting loosely on Mark’s chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They’ll be fine once they adjust to the changes. Mark will have an even harder time than Renjun will, seeing how he’ll be in a whole different country without his friends and family. If Mark has to go through that much, Renjun will see that he can get through this as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We’ll be fine,” Renjun repeats and he believes it with his whole heart. Mark looks proud when he looks at him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s right. And if you really want, we can get married when I get back,” Mark teases.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Shut up,” he mumbles. He chances a look at the big digital clock a distance away to their right. He sees Jeno and the others leisurely making their way back here. Minutes left before Mark has to go.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Say you’ll miss me,” Renjun urges, looking into Mark’s eyes. He knows Mark will miss him, and Mark knows he is aware of this. But when Mark looks at him, Mark understands that Renjun needs to hear it so he says it slowly and genuinely.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll miss you, so much.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It soothes the ache in Renjun’s chest for now and ‘for now’ is good enough because he doesn’t want to break down while sending Mark off and have Mark worry about him throughout his flight. It’ll do for now, and he’ll make it work for the coming two years. He caresses Mark’s cheek and lightly kisses it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love you. Take care of yourself.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love you too.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And that’s all Renjun needs to hear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Bring a Nobel prize back,” Renjun says as a joke to make the mood livelier. He pulls away from Mark’s embrace just as the others approach. Mark doesn’t really want to separate from him so he throws his arm round Renjun’s shoulder and tugs him close. Renjun’s arm goes to his back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark smiles down at him amusedly. “I’m completing my Master’s, Jun, not finding the cure for cancer.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun shrugs. “Then don’t come back till you do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You two changed from lovebirds to dudebros now?” Jaehyun asks with a raise of his brow as he stands before them, taking in their friendly display.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We’ve always been dudebros,” Mark says as he ruffles Renjun’s hair, the same time Renjun says, “I dumped him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark raises a daring eyebrow at Renjun, as if Renjun didn’t just propose to him minutes ago. But that’s a secret only for them to keep. As ridiculous as they are, Renjun actually treasures their impromptu proposals - it’s become their own special thing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun tiptoes and gives Mark a quick placating peck on the cheek. “I’d never dump you, dumbass,” he whispers and Mark smiles at that, ignoring the disgusted faces Donghyuck and Jaemin make watching them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now that everyone’s gathered together again, they all wish Mark one final farewell and watch him disappear beyond the departure gates.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s family leaves after thanking them for coming and the rest of the group decide to grab dinner together. Renjun thinks he could use some friendly company, knowing he’ll just worry uselessly if he’s alone. He won’t be able to hear from Mark for at least the next fifteen hours.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Renjun returns home, it’s late and he goes straight to sleep. He wakes and goes about his day until he receives a phone call from an unsaved number. He picks it up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey babe,” comes from the other end. A tired, scratchy voice with a hint of a smile. “It’s me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun sits comfortably on his couch, hugs his knees and listens as Mark complains of jet lag. He smiles a tiny smile to himself. He knows they’ll be okay.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong> <em>Four.</em> </strong>
</p>
<p>It’s Mark’s birthday tomorrow.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tomorrow’s a Saturday and today is the last working day of the week. His lab colleagues from work had planned a surprise dinner for him and he’d ask Renjun to join them. It’s mostly because he wants Renjun to be there but another part of it is because his colleagues are probably going to get him drunk and he’d taken the car to work today. He needs someone to drive him back and it’s the perfect excuse to make Renjun join him. Mark knows he’s making use of Renjun but it’s his birthday and Renjun has done the same thing to him plenty of times before. They’re boyfriends but they’re also each other’s designated drivers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun’s taking the subway to meet them at the restaurant and he’s running a little late because he had to take care of a few last-minute issues at work. Mark texts him that they’re already inside and that<em>no, you don’t have to rush. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun enters the restaurant about twenty minutes later. Doyoung, one of Mark’s colleagues, spots Renjun first and motions him over. When Mark looks up, he sees Renjun with windswept hair, hand clutching the work bag slung on his shoulder tightly. Renjun looks slightly disoriented as he makes his way over to their table, likely from the fact that he had been rushing even though Mark had told him not to. There’s a pretty flush on his cheeks from exertion and Mark thinks he looks lovely still. Renjun meets his eyes and Renjun gives him an embarrassed, apologetic smile for being late. Renjun reaches their table and Mark extends a hand to hold Renjun’s waist as Renjun slides into the vacant seat beside him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun leans towards him and kisses him on the cheek.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Happy birthday, babe.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark squeezes his waist gently in thanks before he pulls his arm across Renjun’s back and rests it back in his lap.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark pours him a glass of wine. “Reminder that my birthday is actually <em>tomorrow</em>, so I’m still twenty-six as of now,” Mark emphasises, to which Renjun gives a roll of his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He says this but he acts fifty from how much he complains of back pain,” Renjun says, accepting the plate of cut steak and potatoes Taeyong, another of Mark’s colleague, offers him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Standing for hours in lab does things to you,” Jaemin says, pointing his wine glass at Renjun before taking a worryingly large gulp. By some coincidence or luck, Jaemin received the offer to join Mark’s research group just a week after Mark did and now they joke about how fate wants them together for life.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark rests his hand on Renjun’s thigh and he looks at Renjun with a sparkle in his eyes. “See they all have back pains too, it’s not just me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun shakes his head. He holds his wine glass and raises it to the center of the table. “Well, then here’s to Mark Lee’s last few moments of being twenty-six and to all your backs sacrificed in the name of science.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A jumble of <em>Mark Lee</em>, <em>back pains</em>and <em>science</em>erupts as their glasses clink together. Yuta, yet another one of Mark’s colleagues, orders another bottle of wine and Mark knows it’s going to be a long night. But when Renjun puts his hand over his and squeezes it, he focuses only on that and tries not to think about the mess his colleagues have planned for the night.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After dinner, Jaemin and Yuta suggest getting beer and fried chicken, to which Renjun and Doyoung protest since they’re both the assigned drivers for the night. Mark’s the birthday boy so he gets to make the call and he sides with the non-drivers. They split into two groups; Renjun takes Mark and Jaemin while Doyoung take Taeyong and Yuta.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark has shotgun and Jaemin occupies the whole back seat by himself like its his throne.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They visited the convenience store a few blocks down from the restaurant before they got in the car. Renjun had bought a couple of bottled water and he throws one to the back which Jaemin barely catches and drops the other one into Mark’s lap, demanding both of them to drink up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark drinks it because he doesn’t want to get too wasted but Jaemin requires some convincing before he uncaps the bottle and takes a few tiny sips. Jaemin eventually takes larger gulps when Renjun nags at him from the wheel, but he threatens to be drinking beer by the barrel later on. Renjun huffs and Mark sends him a sorry look on his best friend’s behalf.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You know what’s funny?” Jaemin starts and Renjun lets out a long sigh as he looks at the road, knowing that Jaemin is going to start drunk-babbling. “You two. You two are so funny.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark rolls his head away from the window to exchange an amused glance with Renjun. Renjun makes a face, one that tells he’s up to his limit with Jaemin’s bullshit and it makes Mark laugh. Mark decides to save Renjun from it so he turns his head back to entertain Jaemin himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why do you say that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You two hated each other!” Jaemin exclaims, as if the reason is plain obvious. “And now you’ve been glued to each other for years. <em>Years</em>. If you told me this during second year of college, I would have betted my life savings that it was never going to happen.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We didn’t hate each other,” Mark counters which Renjun supports by adding, “It was a misplaced emotion.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jaemin laughs maniacally and topples over the seats. He lies on his back facing the roof of the car. Renjun scolds him into wearing his seatbelt but Jaemin hotly argues wearing seatbelts makes him sick. Mark tells Renjun to let it slide because Jaemin’s puked in Doyoung’s car before and he does not want to go through that experience again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You guys despised each other for a whole year and suddenly you were sucking faces at Donghyuck’s party. Just like that!” Jaemin says, sounding part hysterical. “We all thought it was going to last three months, max.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Your point?” Renjun asks listlessly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark recalls the memory fondly. It happened so long ago he forgot they had that phase where they got on each other’s nerves almost every single day. Back then Renjun would step into the tutorial room, stare him down and throw him an insult before saying anything to anyone else. It irked him immensely but somehow as time passed, his irritation fizzled and he found himself subconsciously looking for Renjun in lecture theatres. As he continued to be Renjun’s number one target, he started finding Renjun’s antics… cute. Then the party happened and fast-forward a few years, here they are. It’s funny how Renjun’s hotheadedness has now become one of the things Mark adores about him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark turns to face Renjun and rests his head against his seat. When Renjun chances a glance at him, he mouths with a smile,<em>I didn’t hate you, babe</em>. A smile tugs on the corner of Renjun’s lips and Mark can tell he’s holding back another eye roll. They both know how much they argued before Renjun had decidedly asked him out. Mark likes that they can look back on those memories fondly now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You guys make me sick,” Jaemin says and he lets out a wistful sigh. “I want to have that in my life too.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Mark laughs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m drunk! It doesn’t have to meaning anything!” Jaemin exclaims. He groans all of a sudden and sits up, a hand covering his mouth. He makes a retching sound and breathes deeply. Renjun winces. Jaemin swallows and breathes out. “I’m just rambling.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Maybe if you drank more water,” Renjun grits out.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s just nice to see,” Jaemin continues, leaning back limply against the seat, ignoring Renjun. “What you guys have. This kind of love isn’t that easy to come by.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jaemin being sentimental makes the atmosphere in the car take a turn and catches Mark by surprise. Mark knows for a fact that if Jaemin wasn’t drunk, he wouldn’t have said all those things. He didn’t know Jaemin thought of him and Renjun that way. It makes him wonder if that’s how they appear to everyone else too. Sure, he’s grateful to have Renjun in his life and he loves Renjun more than words can ever do justice to but he hadn’t known that other people admired what they have. It makes him feel thankful.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’ll find it too, it’s just a matter of time,” Renjun says gently.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Maybe. But for now, I wanna get drunk,” Jaemin says with an obnoxious smirk. Renjun scoffs and Mark laughs and everything goes back to how it was before. Jaemin abruptly starts belting along to the radio. Mark smiles when Renjun looks over at him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” he says quietly. “I love you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re drunk,” Renjun retorts but his lips twitch to release a smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Unsurprisingly, Mark gets drunk. They spend another three hours at the chicken place and since it’s Mark’s birthday, he keeps receiving shot after shot from his friends despite Renjun’s threat to break their noses if they offer him another one.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark does drink water whenever Renjun offers it to him and that’s the only reason why he’s stable enough to help Renjun support Jaemin back into the car.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jaemin fortunately does not puke in the car and doesn’t make too much of a fuss during the drive home. Renjun tells Mark to stay put in the car obediently while he sends Jaemin up to his apartment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Renjun comes back down, he looks more worn out than he did ten minutes ago. Mark can only imagine the struggle Renjun had to go through to send Jaemin up all by himself. Mark’s mind is foggy but he wants to thank Renjun for tonight so when Renjun enters the car, he says it and hopes it came out coherent. Renjun gives him a tired smile, palms his cheek tenderly and tells him to put his seatbelt back on. He hadn’t even realise he’d unbuckled it. He hears Renjun say something about how it’s way past midnight and he catches the number twenty-seven coming out of Renjun’s mouth. He thinks he gets the gist of what Renjun is saying. Renjun laughs at him when he groans.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun keeps the volume of the music in the car low but Mark still hums to it, his eyes closed, lethargy slowly creeping up on him. They don’t talk, Renjun’s probably tired and Mark is so sleepy and drunk he can’t even imagine what will come out of his mouth if he tries to talk. But the silence is comfortable.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark rests his head on the headrest, his face turned to the driver’s seat. He blinks in and out of sleep, his vision of Renjun at the steering wheel is blurry each time his eyes open. He registers Renjun laughing at him when his eyes closes yet again and he whines at Renjun for teasing him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love you,” Renjun tells him suddenly, a gentle voice that surfaces from the low hum of the music in the background. The words still make his heart skip.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His eyes remain closed. A smile plays on his lips. “Say it again.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun hums. “I actually hate you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s smile grows wider and he knows he must look like a fool. “Say it again.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun laughs and it falls quiet after. “I love you,” he says a few silent seconds later, just as sincere and as fond as the first time. Mark feels Renjun’s hand resting on his thigh. “We’re almost home.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark isn’t as wasted as Jaemin is so he manages to walk to their apartment with Renjun leading him by his hand. Once in their bedroom, Mark flops down onto the bed and Renjun has to wrestle with him to get his clothes off, leaving him in his thin-bare tee and boxers. Renjun huffs and sits down limply beside Mark’s sprawled form, exhaustion quickly taking over both their bodies.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark cracks an eye open and shifts to rest his head on Renjun’s thigh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ugh, get off me, I’ve had enough of you for one night,” Renjun complains. “I want to wash up, go away.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang Renjun,” Mark says, blinking up at him. Renjun sighs and looks down pointedly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What do you want? Don’t say my full name like that.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang Renjun.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun groans, rubbing his own face. “I think I know where this is going.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, listen to me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun sighs and sweeps Mark’s bangs away from his face. “Yes?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You are so annoying.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Here we go,” Renjun huffs but a smile threatens to break out on his face. “It’s almost three a.m. Make it quick.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark looks him straight in the eyes. “Huang fucking Renjun. Pain in my ass, noise to my ears, hotheaded motherfucker-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Real <em>romantic</em>.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark breaks and laughs. “Without you, I’m Mark Lee. But with you, I’m Mark fucking Lee! And I love that!” Mark says, breathing deeply, gazing into Renjun’s eyes. “I love that. I love you. Marry me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun leans back on his palms. “Why do we always propose when we’re drunk?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think that’s a yes. He said yes!” Mark cries out, smiling to himself and rolling towards Renjun’s stomach. He’s not sure if Renjun actually <em>did </em>say yes but he can’t think of why Renjun wouldn’t. His head starts to throb. He’s probably not as sober as he thought he was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Sure, Mark fucking Lee, I’ll marry you,” Renjun says easily, grabbing Mark’s face and bending down to smooch his forehead loudly. Renjun rolls him away. “Give me a ring next time. Now go the fuck to sleep and let me wash up.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun gets up and leaves Mark alone on the bed. Mark spreads his arms out, face buried into the mattress. “He said yes!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong> <em>Plus one.</em> </strong>
</p>
<p>Mark and Renjun had taken two weeks off during the summer to visit Renjun’s grandmother and spend time with Renjun’s family. It’s been a while since Renjun’s been back home.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They’ve spent about a week here and despite it being Mark’s third time, Renjun’s family still treats him like a valued guest, much to Renjun’s annoyance. Renjun’s family has been nothing short of warm and accommodating and Mark’s pretty sure Renjun is jealous that his grandmother is paying more attention to him than she is to her grandson that she hasn’t physically seen for a year.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They have a week left before they have to leave, but a week goes by so fast they’ll be back in Korea before they know it. Mark wishes they could stay longer. Every time Renjun comes home, he glows. He radiates a warm golden buzz whenever he talks and when he smiles, it dazzles so brightly. Renjun had eagerly shared all the shenanigans he got up to when he was a kid, told Mark little details about the house and his face had lit up every time his mother cooked his favourite dish (practically every dish they’ve had so far). Mark likes seeing him so excited and happy and it makes him glad that he came with. Renjun shines so brightly back home that Mark can’t help but feel sorry he can’t do more to make Renjun feel the same when he’s away from home. So he does his best to make Renjun’s time here full of only good memories.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun’s grandmother lives in the countryside where the land stretches wide between the houses. Renjun’s favourite part of the house is the little wooden front porch overlooking the old unpaved road that runs through the whole town. The road is sandwiched between vast green plains, lined with rusty lampposts that are spaced too far apart. Bright small flowers bloom gracefully all over the field now that it’s summer. They give the greenery a splash of colour, like a trickle of youth to balance the wisdom the aged road carries. It’s pretty in the day when the colours can be seen so vibrantly, but at night it’s the clear sky that steals the spotlight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The humble wooden porch is Renjun’s favourite because he likes to come out at night, rest his elbows on the wooden ledge and watch the sky above. He has been doing it almost every night ever since they arrived and sometimes Mark accompanies him. Sometimes, Mark lets him stand out there alone to gaze at the stars. Other times Mark would lean against the door and watch him from the back, appreciating the serene look on his face and respecting the peace he finds in the calming night sky.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tonight is one of those nights. They’ve had dinner a while ago and Mark had accepted the offer from Renjun’s father of drinking tea together. Renjun had refused, wanting to spend time watching his grandmother’s favourite drama together with her. After Mark’s chat with Renjun’s father in moderately passable Chinese, the sky outside has turned completely dark and Mark knows better than to find Renjun in the living room. He goes to the front of the house and sure enough when he glimpses outside the front door, Renjun is leaning with his elbows on the wooden ledge, his face tilted up to embrace the night breeze. Mark hangs back for a bit, letting Renjun enjoy the night by himself. After a while, he comes from behind and envelopes Renjun in a hug.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun turns his head to the side, surprised but delighted by the embrace. Mark hums contently and Renjun’s hand come to hold Mark’s in front of his stomach. Mark kisses his temple.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” Mark mumbles against the back of his neck. “You look happy.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I am,” Renjun replies, a delicate smile on his lips. “This is my favourite place in the world. Every memory I have here are the ones that I love the most. Being back home feels nice.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a while, the only sounds that accompany them are the melodies from the cicadas and crickets. It doesn’t last long because some heated murmurings flow out from inside the house. Mark is able to pick up some of the words with his limited Chinese vocabulary. It sounds like an argument but calling it an argument is a little funny because it seems that Renjun’s parents are prepping tomorrow’s breakfast and they can’t agree on the right size to cut the potatoes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Should we intervene?” Mark asks with a chuckle.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let them be. They’re always doing that. That’s how they show their care to each other,” Renjun says, teasing yet fond.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark laughs, kisses the back of Renjun’s head and disentangles from him in favour of leaning on the wooden ledge just like how Renjun had been earlier. Renjun joins him to his left and they observe the stars in the cloudless sky quietly. Mark thinks about them, what they would be like in the decades to come. He rests his left hand in his pocket, leans on one arm and twists his body just enough to look at Renjun. “You know, one day that’ll be us.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun side glances him with a raised brow. “We already argue over potatoes, Mark.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“And we’ll argue over every other produce. And then maybe we’ll have a dog or two, and you’ll nag at me to take the dogs out for a walk, but you’ll come with, you always do and-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hold on Mark Lee,” Renjun says bewilderedly. “Are you imagining us growing old together?” He slides over the ledge to lean closer to Mark, their noses almost touching. He whispers secretively, eyebrows lifting suggestively. “Am I still hot in my fifties?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark kisses his lips. “Gorgeous, babe.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun shoves his chest lightly. He goes back to draping his arms over the ledge and staring wistfully at the pretty night sky.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can’t give you my golden years just like that,” Renjun says as he closes his eyes and lets the soft night breeze caress his face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You don’t want to grow old with me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun hums. “Show me a ring, then we’ll talk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s supposed to be a joke, like all the other times before but Mark finds that he doesn’t know what to say. Renjun must have expected him to counter with a witty remark because Renjun opens his eyes to check on him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark just thinks it’s strange, how something so small like a ring carries such an immense weight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Renjun’s eyes land on him, he has already taken out the small deep blue velvet box from his pocket into his left hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun stares at him, stunned.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the fuck,” Renjun whispers, slowly detaching from the ledge to take in Mark fully.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark looks up from the velvet box sitting in his palm. He tosses the box lightly with that one hand that’s holding it and catches it back in his palm again. He gives Renjun a pensive smile, one that tells he’s been ruminating this moment over for a while now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I have a ring now,” he says slowly, like it’s no big deal to be carrying a ring around. Like it’s normal to want to propose at any time he thinks is right.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun looks perplexed. He gestures vaguely at the box. “No shit. Why do you just happen to have a ring on you?” Renjun asks, baffled, staring at Mark.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark simply smiles quietly, waits for Renjun to register for himself what’s truly happening. Renjun’s eyes are frantic when they search his and he eventually puts his palm over his mouth. “You have a ring,” he whispers again when reality finally settles in over the initial shock. “What the fuck.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark can’t say he didn’t expect this reaction. He knows Renjun, they would have to censor all of Renjun’s cursing when they tell this story.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ve been carrying it around for a while now. Even before we flew here,” Mark confesses. He searches Renjun’s face and lets out a nervous laugh. “Are you ready?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun looks flustered and Mark takes his silence as consent to continue.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang Renjun,” he starts. Renjun inhales sharply. His fingers tremble where they hide his mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark’s lips slant into a mischievous smile. “The pain in my ass, noise to my ears, hotheaded-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fucking asshole,” Renjun whispers incredulously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Shall I continue?” Mark jokes, even though they both know Mark won’t go through with a proposal like that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just don’t get on your fucking knees, I will smash that ring to pieces if you do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know, Jun,” Mark says, giving out a small laugh. He reaches for Renjun’s hand and holds it gently in his. It helps with Renjun’s shaking.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun bites the inside of his cheek. “I swear if you even bend your-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jun, please,” Mark interrupts him with a look. “Can you please let me propose?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun takes in a deep breath and tries not to make another sound. His eyes are moist but he gives Mark a reassuring nod.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang Renjun,” Mark starts again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No wait,” Renjun sniffles. “Oh god, I swear I wasn’t going to cry if I ever got proposed to. <em>I</em>wanted to propose!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark sighs but smiles fondly, finding it funny and endearing how Renjun keeps cutting him off. With the hand that’s holding the velvet box, Mark uses his thumb to wipe the few tears that’s escaped Renjun’s eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m sorry. You can continue,” Renjun mumbles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark kisses his lips lightly. “I’m sorry I beat you to it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun’s tears doesn’t allow him to roll his eyes properly and the attempt makes Mark smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Huang Renjun,” Mark says for the third time. “I know you hate romantic gestures because you think they’re cringey. So I’ve been carrying this ring around while thinking of how to ask you without you vomiting your guts out. And I think we both know you’d appreciate it if I just went straight for it. I’ll save the sappy bits for our vows.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun swallows and Mark takes him being silent as a good sign to continue. “Jun, I’ve loved you for a long time now and I’ve asked you plenty of times before, but this time will be the last of them all.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Yes,</em>” Renjun sobs out and tears start streaming down his cheeks. His answer is a little too early considering Mark hasn’t even popped the question yet but he’s already crying hysterically. He’s ridiculously lovable.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jun,” Mark laughs. “I haven’t even asked!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun looks sorry that he’d interrupted Mark again but he’s too busy trying not to be a mess. He laughs in between his tears and manages a, “I’m sorry, pretend I didn’t say anything.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark lets go of Renjun’s hand in favour of opening the box. Inside sits a silver band - a simple ring, beautiful and delicate. He knew it would fit Renjun’s liking the moment he saw it. The look on Renjun’s face tells him he was right. He takes in a deep breath and even though he already knows Renjun’s answer, he’s still nervous.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I want to be your husband and grow old with you. Will you marry me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun nods silently, a smile lighting up his face. Mark feels utter relief as he slides the band onto Renjun’s ring finger. They both stare at it, too consumed with warmth and happiness as they admire it on Renjun’s hand. Renjun throws his arms around Mark’s neck and Mark catches him steadily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I hate you,” Renjun mutters and it makes Mark smile. “I can’t believe you made me cry. You know I hate crying,” Renjun grumbles but he’s snuggling into the crook of Mark’s neck. Mark kisses his hair and caresses his head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I hate you too,” Mark says warmly. “You’re my fiancé now,” Mark murmurs into his hair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Renjun pulls back to look at Mark’s face. There aren’t any more tears in his eyes and they shine so brightly. “Only took us a dozen proposals,” he laughs. He holds Mark’s face and pulls Mark in, letting their lips meet slowly. Mark holds Renjun by his nape and he licks Renjun’s lips sweetly. When Renjun opens up, he doesn’t waste any time to take it deeper. Renjun is just as passionate. The kiss is exhilarating and ardent, fervent yet shy, a promise and a mark of a new beginning.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They tone it down tactfully before it gets too much. Once they’ve calmed themselves enough to not look like an embarrassing mess, Mark laces their fingers together and brings them inside. Renjun bashfully calls for his family’s attention and raises his hand to show off the ring with a shy smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>An eruption of cheers ensues and Renjun steals a glance at Mark in the midst of it, glowing bright and golden. Renjun mouths out <em>I love you </em>and Mark manages to squeeze his hand before Renjun gets whisked away to recount with detail how the proposal happened.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mark feels a light, fluttery feeling in his chest and he thinks, this is the best decision he’s ever made.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i hope the changing pov didn’t make it difficult to read. This fic came about because i thought getting my two main characters to keep proposing to each other in non-typical, non-cliché ways would be fun to write! hope it was as fun to read!</p>
<p>thanks to colette for listening to me when i first came up with this idea &lt;333</p>
<p>comments make writers happy!<br/><a href="https://twitter.com/hapatakup">twt</a> <a href="https://curiouscat.me/subaks">cc</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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